I Love You Mama.
It took me a long time to be able to tell that to my mother. Too long. For most of my life, I just ignored my mother. To my eternal shame, I was such a bad son that I don’t even have a picture of her and me to put in this post. That woman loved me with everything she had, and all I did to pay it back was give her pain and grief. I neglected her so badly that it had to take something big for me to realize how much she loved me. That woman loved me. With this, I hope that I can make her feel my love.
My mother never once complained, but I know now that it wasn’t easy to raise me and take care of my father at the same time. I guess to make a long story short, me and my father were both “difficult men.” My father’s disability made communication hard. My strong personality made getting things through to me a bit challenging. Still, my mom kept on being a good wife and a good mother. Sometimes I imagine myself being in her shoes and if I were her, I would have packed up and left decades ago. She is a strong woman.
I remember my mom slapping me a few times as a teenager. I don’t blame her, I really deserved it. Screw child services on this one, some kids just need to get beaten up to straighten up. I was one such case. But to be honest, I also made her break down and cry in front of me a number of times – something that a child should never put a mother through. I remember telling her once that I don’t love her with coldness in my voice. It must have been one of the most painful things she ever heard. With everything I put her through when I was growing up, she just kept being her: my mother. She is a patient woman.
My mother always told me to avoid offending anyone. She always told me to turn the other cheek. Sometimes she would be put in a situation where I know she should already be arguing or at least complaining, but she always chose peace. She’s friends with a few people that I don’t even like one bit. She’s friends with a few unpleasant people and when I tell her not to be around those people, she would always tell me that they’re good people inside, that we should just take the bad with the good since nobody is perfect. She always tried to see the good in people. I have a few friends who aren’t “good people.” I guess I got some of that from her. She is a good woman.
My mom always tells me to “give Jesus a place in my heart” and I always tell her I don’t believe in it anymore but she still prays for me. Even now that I’m far away, she always does what I ask her to do for me. She takes care of my daughter in my place and she spoils her too much sometimes that it makes me worry. She tells me stories of how things are in the Motherland and how she takes care of everyone and I’m proud to say that my mother has one big heart. She is a loving woman.
For everything she has gone through; for everything I made her go through, I just can’t help but thank the Universe for giving me such a great mother. Not to brag or anything but people have told me how easy I am to get along with and I think I owe much of that to my mother who taught me to respect people. I have friends that I shouldn’t be friends with, and friends so difficult that they shouldn’t even have friends at all but I see the good in these people, just like she taught me. I really have one heck of a mother.
I love her and I promised her that I’ll provide for her forever. She has taken care of me and a lot of people throughout her life, she still does, but I hope that one day I’ll be able to take care of her full-time and return every bit of care she gave me. I really don’t agree with her religious beliefs anymore, but if the second coming happened and Jesus really came back, I am a hundred percent sure that Jesus would kidnap her to heaven while I burn in hell for all eternity. Seriously, I have one heck of a mother.
I love you mama. You gave me everything. You still give me your everything. Don’t worry too much about me, I’m doing fine. Worry about you, because you’re not that young and strong anymore. I promised you once that I’ll give you a really comfortable life; that one day I’ll take you to the most beautiful places that I’ve ever been; that one day I’ll feed you all the good food that I’ve ever tried in my life; that one day we’ll be together and that I’ll take care of you. Just wait a little longer mama and take care of yourself and I promise you we’ll get there. I love you so much mama.
To my mom and to all the great mothers out there who give their children everything they have:
HAPPY MOTHERS’ DAY!!!